Ravyn is holding another art thing, but I've been falling far behind on all the art I've promised her. I'm really trying. It seems the stuff I wanna draw is the stuff I can't seem to get right. Nothing looks good enough. I want what I give her to be the best I can do, but it never looks right. I'm ashamed to give her some stuff, because it's not right. It bothers me to think I'd be giving her something I've tried so hard to get right but doesn't look right at all. At least I have the first bundle of coasters inked now.
Love triangles suck. I like Steve, who says he likes me back, but Aimee also likes Steve, who claims he said that he returns the like-ing-ness, so now I'm trying to not be sad about it, because he just more or less played me. Waddajerk.
So, now, back to square one.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
crappy - Music:One Step Closer- Linkin Park remix
Ok, so the prom party was fun!
Well, I got there with Jess and Jord, who had the music pumpin' in his car. So, showing up in style: CHECK!
I found my Chrissy quickly, and she shared her booze, and so did Gabbie! I ended up getting drunk, making random friends, and talking to old enemies like they were my best friends. Being the life of the party: Check!
I bunked with Steve Crosby, whom I made out with and held hands. I didn't get any sleep, but I did on sunday, because a woman I work with saved me. She's always saving people who have hangovers or who are just too tired to function.
Back to Steve...I think I like him a lot, and I would like to have a relationship with him, because he's sweet, and he's really funny! Cute, too. =) lol He said he thought I was "smokin' " so, I kinda liked that. Get the guy: Check?
- Location:Home
- Mood:
confused - Music:No Shoes No Shirt Cory Lee
Weeeeeeell then. People suck. Again.
People who don't learn from their mistakes are fools. Obviously.
Especially in matters of so called love.
This weekend was the dance at the Mariner's Center. Great, right?
No so much.
At first, it was great! Me and Katie danced to techno beats while waiting for Deanna, and when Deanna got there, we danced some more. Then, it happened.
Justin showed up with his slutty, acusatory girlfriend.
For those who don't know who the two of them are, it's simple.
Justin is my ex. And, no, I'm not jealous. I just reeeeeaally don't like her. For good reason. Listen:
His girlfriend acused Deanna's boyfriend of sexual harrassment, and Justin knows all about it. Deanna is ready to kill her the first chance she gets...at least hurt her a lot. And he starts walking toward us, like it's not obvious or anything, and is pretty much walking straight for us.
I panic, so I grab Deanna's hand and lead her away. Me and Katie calm her down a bit, and go over and talk to Justin.
"Can I talk to you?...Are you looking to get your girlfriend killed?"
"What?"
"You know that Deanna will kill her if she has the chance, and you were walking right for us!"
"I didn't know it was you guys!"
"Yeah, right, how obvious can it get?"
"What the hell? What if I wanna talk my woman out for a good time?"
"You have to be careful of these things!"
What I should have said was:
"WOMAN?! She's 14 fucking years old! She's a slut! She's not a woman! She's a GIRL. And what the hell kinda good time can you be having if your girlfriend is getting the crap beat out of her?"
To be honest, I don't think I would have held her back...I would have let Deanna go at her, if I didn't think she'd get in trouble.
But...whatever...Deanna's a good listener, and her reward for that is all the moral support(and physical, sometimes!) she gets from her friends!
WE ALL LOVE YOU DEANNA!!!!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
angry - Music:None
Click the link, type in your e-mail(confidential) and click vote to help a colleague of mine get an art scholarship at the Art Institute. Just click to vote for her art! She deserves it! She, like me, makes art for miss Ravyn Crescent, and is the official manga artist for Predator Turned Prey.
Good Luck, Allyson Amador!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
determined - Music:My sister's constant ring tone.
Ok, not everyday you hear that someone who you don't usually interact with has a dream about you. Kinda how a guy from school, Kyle, had a dream about me. This is how his dream went:
This is a conversation we had about it; he's 66:
66 says:
Me and someone else... were like walking down this trail in the woods
66 says:
And we found bikes
66 says:
and started riding them
66 says:
Eventually we came across a house in the woods in a rather clearing
66 says:
Moreless a log house..
66 says:
And it was dark now.. the ride was very long
66 says:
My friend got lost in the darkness
66 says:
and i stayed just outside the house
66 says:
it had lit windows
66 says:
but i was in the shades of the darkness
66 says:
and like these weird people came out at one point..
66 says:
And one of them saw me
- -m.SMITH- - says:
silent hill, baby
- -m.SMITH- - says:
66 says:
LOL
- -m.SMITH- - says:
continue
66 says:
hahaha
66 says:
Okay
66 says:
Then like one of them came to me
66 says:
and started throwing ninja stars at me
66 says:
and i had them all stuck over my body
66 says:
But eventualy i killed him with a stick
66 says:
and i took out the star thingy's
66 says:
and waited for daylight
66 says:
once it was day i ran to the bikes
66 says:
and started heading back, and i decided to not even look for my friend
66 says:
becuase his bike was missing
66 says:
so i thought maybe he like lived
66 says:
when i got back to the streets, outside the forest
66 says:
i went to peb, but it didn't really look anything like peb at all
66 says:
and you were there
66 says:
and you saw that i was like bleeding and stuff
66 says:
And you took me to the school doctor LOL
66 says:
Eventualy when i was feeling better...
- -m.SMITH- - says:
LMAO the School doctor!
66 says:
You came over to my house
66 says:
And it was like really sunny
66 says:
the drive to my house was like really nice veiws and stuff
66 says:
Blue sky white clouds..
66 says:
ect
66 says:
And like once we got to my house
66 says:
My parents made you do work
66 says:
Like labour
66 says:
And i told them i would take your place LOL
66 says:
and you went inside the house
- -m.SMITH- - says:
sweet
66 says:
and i did work for like...
66 says:
6 hours
66 says:
When i was done the door was locked
66 says:
and it was semi dark
66 says:
and there was a note in the door like outside
66 says:
And i grabbed it and started reading it
66 says:
and it was a poem written by you
66 says:
but i couldn't finish becuase it got really dark
66 says:
so i ran around in the darkness
66 says:
looking for a street light
66 says:
but i woke up before i found one hahaha
So...yeah...I'm still laughing about it!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
amused - Music:Buttons- PCD
Jessica wanted to go to this exciting windmill party, but didn't have a babysitter. I said I'd do it(reluctantly), but I'm super pissed now. I hate babysitting when something's going on.
Not only that, but I burnt my fucking finger on a fucking spoon at work. It's blistering already. It's gross. I want to go to a motherfucking party!!!!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
pissed off - Music:I Wanna Fuck You- Akon
But, miraculously, she was being suuuuuch a good little kid. Funny, even. And it was a day that I was super tired, too. So, needless to say, I'm feeling much better about saying yes to babysitting. Though, I sometimes forget that we're potty training her. Mum keeps reminding me.
Also, she woke twice during the night, but she went back to sleep after a few "shhh"s from me.
Yeah, so, it turns out I wasn't the one who dislocated her arm, either, so that's a relief. It happened when she got hit with a swing while Tammy was babysitting her. She ran out in front of the swings while Morgan was in mid-swing, and obviously you can't just stop in mid-air, so they collided. Though, for some reason, I still feel guilty.
Oh well, Jessica doesn't blame me, neither does mum, but most importantly, Cheyanne seems to have forgotten all about the event.
But, I mean, she IS only two years old.
Man, I hope Jess comes home early. Then I'll be able to take a nap before work.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
sleepy - Music:None
Ok, so...this has to be one of the worst weekends of my life so far.
First, I get sick on friday. But, I got better. That's good.
But then me and dad almost got in an two car collision, but the other car swerved at the last minute and hit a tree, spinning into the ditch. I had to call 911, for police assistance and an ambulance and all that stuff, but it freaked me out quite bad...my dad kept telling me that we were lucky to even be here.
Then, after a day of reccouperation, however you spell it, Gramp died. Everyone called him Smokey, but I grew up knowing him as Gramp because of my third cousins, Ty and Kayla, but he's not really my gramp. He had cancer and was sick for some time, in the hospital and all that, and then his suffering finally came to an end on May 6. It was a sad day, because of all the head shaking and tears. I had to go home that day, too.
And then, finally, I wanted to apologize to Ravyn for missing my deadline on the clock, which was this weekend. So, she was angry, and with good reason, too. But it's too late to make up for lost time, because she has already ordered the merchandise she's taking with her. So...I don't really know what to do.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
depressed - Music:None
I'm babysitting my neice, and she's a pain, but she wipes her own bum, so I'm lucky. She's two, and we're just starting to potty train her, and she can already wipe her own bum. It's a nice discovery.
Anyway, I don't know what else to say on this post, so I'll talk to you guys later!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
bored - Music:None
Well, I haven't updated for a while, so, here I go.
Thursday was the 30-hour famine. I drank lots of water and juice, and had only one cup of rice that night. However, I caved before 3 the next day. I woke up, and I was fine. But then, I got up and I was craving food so badly. I guess I understand how those children must feel in other parts of the world.
I haven't done any fundraising yet, but I think I'll get to that later on.
Went to Barrington yesterday. Ricky had to go to Wilson's, so I tagged along, and while I was there, I found a beautiful glass engraving of a realistic looking woman and daughter. I bought it for mum for mother's day, as well as a pretty card.
Then, and this is the funny part, I went all Pokemon addict and actually bought another Pokemon game. I got the Pearl Version for my DS, and I have to say, it pains me to take time off from playing the game to post this entry. I have never been so addicted to a Pokemon game in my life. I mean, come on...it's Pokemon. I'm surprised I even bought it. I feel like a nerd. Ahahaha. The graphics are awesome. It's 3-fucking-D. How much more awesome can you get? TOUCH SCREEN. That's how much!
I also bought a Dora the Explorer game for Cheyanne. It's really boring. But, Chey-Pie seems to like it. Or... like watching it. She'll play it more when she's older...like 5.
So I suckered Ron into doing the dishes at work while Becky trained me to be a cook. I want to do it again today, but Jess doesn't want to train me. I bet I could persuade her, though. I think I'll try.
Anyway, that's about it for my update.
Later!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
chipper - Music:None
It's difficult business dealing with decisions like these.
I can't think of anyone!
Maybe Gabbie will.
I wish I weren't so picky, but I can't help it.
Anyway, haven't updated in a while, so I thought I'd note this.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
weird - Music:What I've Done- Linkin Park
So. Going to the dentist was as horror film-like as I thought. It was quick (enough) and relatively painless.
And, of course, I have to go back again on tuesday. Am I really being punised for something?
On a better note, I love Saan. That store has everything a young girl like me and Katie could ever want!
Speaking of Katie, I'm at her house today! New Location! :D
She's gonna dye my hair today! I'll post some pictures on my site when they develop. We bought a disposable camera at Saan's, as well as some "red" hairdye. I thought I was gonna get a coupon inside for free admission to any Empire Studios cinemas, but the coupon had expired last year.
Stupid false advertisments. DEATH BE TO THEM!!!
I still love Saan's, though. =)
- Location:Katie-bun's House
- Mood:
excited - Music:Fighting Dreamers - Naruto
Kidding. Bad oral hygiene causes cavities.
Cavities means fillings!
Hoorah for fillings?
Doubtful.
I got back from the dentist today. My appointment was for 2:30 and my jaw only thawed around 7:30.
Kinda sucks, having your jaw numb. I'm not looking forward to filling my other cavity next week. It hurts to eat. Or, rather, to chew.
I don't wanna get another filling!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
blank - Music:None
Me and Chad kinda decided against the relationship, because he felt it was weird to date me, because he considers me family more than anything.
Which, I can't understand...since he makes sexual comments often...which you just don't do with your family.
Also, if he considered me family, he should've known not to date me in the first place, which would've hurt a lot less.
But, I don't know what exactly I was thinking, either. I should've known better than to accept going with him in the first place, since he
But...I suppose we'll get through this after a while of talking about it.
I'll be fine, after all, a friend told me that I won't be alone.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
sad - Music:None
Try to find someone smarter, I dare you!
She'll knock your socks off with her flaming orange hair, and kick ass Tae-Kwon-Do moves.
And, she'll be loyal to you till the end!
Love you bunches, Katie!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
chipper - Music:None
We went to the movies after all, even though everything seemed to go wrong earlier in the day.
We didn't go see the movie we originally planned to. We planned to go see The Reaping, but we ended up going to see Blades of Glory again, instead.
Here's why:
Gabbie was my ride to and from town...or rather, her Grandfather was. Anyway, he wanted to see one of the early shows, so we had no choice. Gabbie had no problem with it since she had never seen it.
Anyway, me and Chad held hands most of the time, and it was nice. I like being close to him. He doesn't even have to do anything. I like when he gives my hand a little squeeze, or rubs my thumb with his. Little things like that make me shiver with delight.
Then, once the movie was over, Chad's parents were there to give him a ride home. He gave me the sweetest kiss I think I've ever had. It was quick, simple and delicate. It, too, was nice.
Anyway, I think I'm off to sleep now, so that I can dream and preserve the moment in the lobby of the theater. Buh bye for now!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
happy - Music:None
But, today hasn't been the best day, though. I got up this morning, and the power went out. No biggie, I can handle power outages.
But then, the phone card my dad bought me got ruined when I tried to scratch the sticky part off to reveal the code, so now I can't use it.
And, of course, PEB didn't have school today, because the power outage was all throughtout Tusket and Wedgeport, and wouldn't be up again until 11 o'clock or so. So, that kinda put a damper in my plans to go to town with Chad.
So, now I've got to find a way to town, which will be difficult, since I can't drive, and even if I could, no one would let me have the car.
And, things are starting to get into a bad mood again...I'm hoping to get out of the house for a while, just to get away from this atmosphere that threatens to blow my mood apart.
So...anyone going to town?
- Location:Home
- Mood:
confused - Music:None
I'm in veeeeery good mood!
First; Things at home are starting to slowly get better!
Second; I have a boyfriend! And he's super sweet, super cute, and, also, super horny. XD But, I've been after him for a while, and, finally, he's decided that he wants me in return. It's a nice feeling. : )
On a suckier note(but not too sucky to blow my mood apart :D) my internet half died. I can't seem to connect to my msn, because my key ports are messed. I dunno, whatever. I can still post in my journal! That's good enough for now...but I wanna talk to Chad! :'(
Anyway, life lesson here: Don't let the bad things in life control your life, because then you might miss out on the best things in life.
Thanks for reading guys!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
loved - Music:None
I just feel like crying a bit. A lot.
I don't even feel like ranting.
This is...awful for me. I don't know what to do.
- Location:Home(unfortunately)
- Mood:
depressed - Music:None
"The dishes aren't done."
I had done them quite enough times since Jessica had done them, so I replied: "Tell it to Jessica."
She ended up letting it go.
Or so I thought.
Not even ten minutes later, she said, "Your room isn't very clean, either..." I could have handled it if she had ended it like that. But, instead, she ended it like this:
"...Should I blame that on Jessica, too?"
I was so angry about that, that I ranted to Katie about it, after a sharp and equally bitter "no" for my reply.
On a happier note, Brianna Garcia e-mailed me back with a link to her comic strip and story titled When Curiosty Met Insanity, which cheered me up a bit.
But...the bitterness never leaves the atmosphere here. It's suffocating, really. I need to make/have more outings with my friends, because if not, I'll not make it out of here alive.
- Location:Home
- Mood:
lonely - Music:How Long- Hinder
